Numb…

I chastised myself for feeling chilled as another shiver ran down my spine.
I don’t want to feel it…
A cool breeze, filled with memories and words I’d rather forget, snuck in through the broken window, echoed down the hallway, then vanished…
I held myself closer, rubbing my arms in disgust, forbidding another shiver.
There was a time when I was warm… the sunshine used to kiss my skin making me feel alive…
But now in this darkness I was cold…
Standing alone, I stared at the window…
I had hung lace curtains there once… in all the hopefulness of a young heart that believed in love.
But now, to the rhythm of a heartless wind, the lace danced mournfully. Casting eerie shadows across the slivered floor as their delicate edges surrender to jagged shards of glass…
Laughing happily, sunbeams force their way in… not knowing that darkness awaits to swallow them up…
Driven raindrops reach out in desperate determination, settling on my dress… adding to the damp and chill…
The scent of wet earth and dying flames fill the air…
I haven’t a place here anymore…
My hand rests uncomfortably on the latch, yet I can’t seem to turn it…
With no where to go, and this all I know, I remain.
Memories of a past never lived fall as teardrops on a pair of shoes that no longer fit, but laces of regret hold them fast…
A whispered cry for another soul is silenced by the awareness that this is no place to entertain company.
Because somehow, even within the emptiness, unsettlement commands the room…
For, though this existence belongs to me, I am out of place…
Hidden, silent and unknown…
Unexplainable in many ways…
The voice of who I used to be hums a song I’ve long forgotten…
It too becomes lost in the echoing corridors of my heart…
And I become numb again…